Habanero Press

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National Party Council To Face Zenaida

25435Saturday, 3rd October 2009. Mayor Zenaida “Big Balls” Moya-Flowers will today meet with the UDP’s National Party Council. It is expected that the Party Council will have a lot to answer for based on the charges Zenaida listed in her media appearance after court this past Thursday.

Party insiders describe the Party Council members as being “very nervous” and “hopeful that they will be able to explain themselves satisfactorily to Zenaida.” Some of the things members expect to be challenged about include: whether or not any of them knows what it’s like to have to change diapers while people are talking about you, how many of them have ever gotten roundabouts with large phallic designs donated, who has the most minions, and who has the coolest sunglasses.

Several members have reputedly been seen standing nervously in front of their mirrors, pants down and rulers in hand, as rumours have leaked that Zenaida may also dare them to prove who has the bigger balls. Sources within her camp are loudly optimistic that the Mayor will win such a contest “hands down.”

Contacts close to Zenaida say that she is prepared to let the members of the National Party Council remain within the UDP, but that things will have to be different in the future. It is not clear whether she will allow Dean Barrow to remain in place as Party Leader.


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3 Responses

  1. Anonymous says:

    Hahahahaha, am still chuckling. I have this silly grin on my face, while I’m writing this comment. I did like the sunglasses, but what threw me out was how it fitted on her nose, with her nostrils flared. What arrogance! Am sure “Finni’ baby doesn’t need to prove how big his balls are. Wish I could be the fly on the wall at this meeting.
    Well, we shall see what happens over the weekend

  2. Omar Silva says:

    Besides all the corruption that I am sure exists at all levels of the UDP municipalities and Central Government, there is a serious power struggle within the UDP party structure and it even appears that Dean Barrow is fearing Moya’s eventual challenge of his leadership. When comparing all the incompetents within the UDP National Party Council Executive, Zenaida is the closest of all the incompetents that may be able to challenge Barrow for the UDP leadership. But the truth of the matter is that Zenaida is the stronger of the two and with seemingly more ball…indeed!

  3. CityCrab says:

    Zenaida, she had the biggest ball.
    Patrick had two but they were small.
    Bootsie’s were stink and rootsy,
    but poor old Deano had no balls at all…

    * Sung to Colonel Bogey’s March

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